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Sometimes, the thought of having sex or looking at a picture of your favorite celebrity can turn the sex switch on automatically. However, arousal is not always easy. "Our gender transition is intimately linked to everything that happens around us and in our bodies. Marian Brandon, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist.
Think about it: work stress, physical illness, medication side effects, or a myriad of external influences can affect your mood for sex. But even if you don't want to have sex right now, that doesn't mean you have to give up the idea. The secret is in dealing with it.
Of course, sexual desire will come and go, but when you don't feel it at all, you can actually give yourself some stimulation. "Ideas are very powerful. "Said Brandon. It can wake up and shut down your thoughts about sex. "So if you've made up your mind, be prepared. The following sexology expert will teach you a move, provoke your sexual desire in sex, find your sexy self.
Tips for Comfortable sex 1. Connect with your body
Before thoughts of sex come to mind and everything gets hot, the first step is to build up the energy in your body. "It's hard to be physically happy when your body doesn't feel safe or comfortable. "Said Brandon. To make sex more enjoyable, she recommends exercising, breathing deeply, or spending more time outdoors to feel connected to your body. It's not to make you look strong or anything like that." She said it's about how you feel inside. Feeling at ease = feeling sexy.
Tips for Comfortable sex 2. Create a scene
"Create an attractive, erotic sex space in your home -- not only will it not be quiet, but your body will be directly aroused. "Said Brandon. Dim the lights, remove the fluffy pillows and sheets, and hit play to create a burning atmosphere. Think less about the sex space and imagine all sorts of wild things in your head.
Tips for Comfortable sex 3. Take a bath.
Now that you've bonded with each other, it's time to awaken your inner feral cat, Brandon says. Even if things don't seem like much at first, taking a shower before sex can help ease your mind into gear. Light a lavender candle to create a dreamy atmosphere, relax, and dab some water on your body to turn you on.
Tips for Comfortable sex 4. Masturbate (even though you may not like it at first)
Think you're not good enough to have sex? no problem "You can masturbate even in the absence of sexual desire. "Said Brandon. It can help you get interested in your body and feel those sexy feelings. It may not sound intuitive, but sometimes the orgasm comes first, the arousal. In addition to helping you fall asleep and reduce stress, it can also arouse your sex drive.
Tips for Comfortable sex 5. Try yoga.
When it comes to affording arousal, sometimes just go with the beat. Practicing yoga or meditation can help awaken your inner desire and ultimately improve the quality of sex, Brandon says. So far, only the U.S. National Center for Biotechnology Information has done a few related studies looking at the connection between yoga and sex, but think about it: yoga focuses on specific postures and breathing. Sounds familiar, right?
Tips for Comfortable sex 6. Watch porn that stimulates your vision.
Yes, there must be a sex drive that helps you have sex. After all, some people are visual animals, right? If watching adult movies doesn't feel new (and not at all embarrassing) to you, Brandon suggests getting creative. Watching Harry Styles' "Light Up" video with hints of "multiplayer sports," ice skating IG, or watching female-only porn can make you feel something between your legs, right?
Tips for Comfortable sex 7. Read something exciting.
There is no reason why Fifty Shades of Grey should be popular. Brendan suggests paying attention to the new things in the erotic world. Read it guilt-free, and maybe you'll start thinking about what to do, telling yourself "I need to calm down" as you read. Even browsing pornography -- articles like this or comments about sex toy use -- can get your heart racing.
Tips for Comfortable sex 8. Explore your body.
A little bored with the usual way of having sex? Try exploring other parts of your non-sex organs, says Amy Levine, sex expert and founder of Ignite Your Joy. "For example, pressing on the left and right sides of the labia majora, where the legs meet the pelvis, is a fantastic way to relieve pressure." She said. When lying in bed before sex, try running your fingers over your collarbone and gently pinching your nipples. Once you get the hang of it, you'll probably have some new tricks to use against your partner.
Tips for Comfortable sex 9. Put your to-do list aside for a while.
In the middle of a fantasy, you suddenly remember a pile of laundry? There were extenuating circumstances. "Life is in our head all the time. "Said Brandon. Because you've been thinking about it for the last 16 hours, it's really hard to get your head out of your head about sex. Before you turn off the lights and enjoy your personal time, take out a pen and paper and write down a to-do list to tackle when your personal time is over. Then toss the list aside and get down to business: Discover your sexy side. Enjoying the present can create a happy space, Levine says.
Tips for Comfortable sex 10. A sexually suggestive diet
If eating oysters makes you feel good, go for it! "It's not about what you eat, it's about how you eat. "Said Brandon. How about eating your own hand? Lick the chocolate sauce off your fingers with your tongue?" "She suggested. Focus on the tip of your tongue and enjoy the moment (and the chocolate).
Tips for Comfortable sex11. Dance for yourself
Lock the door, put on a sexy playlist, and start shaking your ass. Sure, dancing alone in an empty room can be a little awkward at first, but go ahead. "Moving your hips and pelvis sensationally helps you embrace your colorful self. Can help boost your confidence during sex. "Said Brandon. Don't worry about doing this in public. This is your own private time.
Tips for Comfortable sex 12. Put on sexy pajamas... Then take it off.
For dancing, Brandon suggested a strip tease. Slowly unbuttoning lacy pajamas in front of the mirror (only on special occasions) can make you feel like a stripper. While admiring your beautiful figure, think about what you like most about your body, Levine says.
Tips for Comfortable sex 13. Recall good sexual experiences in the past.
You probably have at least one good sexual memory that turns you on. "The aftertaste awakens the body and puts it in the zone immediately. "Said Brandon. Whether it's a field fight in the park with an ex-partner or sexy music, remembering a good sexual experience can really help turn you on.
Tips for Comfortable sex 14. Fantasize about events that never happened.
There's no better way to immerse yourself in a sexy and creative sexual fantasy world, fantasizing about poses you've never tried before or have been itching to try. Even if you don't plan to try out these fantasy episodes in real life, you can still use this sexy energy to stimulate yourself. The point is to "connect that sexy energy to another partner." "Said Brandon. Are you doing it alone? Get ready to indulge in the fantasy of great sex.
Tips for Comfortable sex 15. Just keep doing it.
"One thing you need to know is that if you don't integrate lust into your life, it will slowly slip away. "Said Brandon. But don't feel too bad: it happens to everyone. Read your favorite erotic book or masturbate. It's not just about having an orgasm during sex (though that's always expected), it's about strengthening the connection to your own desires. Arousing your own desire may be one of your many talents.